Dr. Danice Akiyoshi
I am an esthetician. Every year I give my three best girlfriends a facial for their birthday gift. They each book their appointment for the week of their birthday like clockwork. If our schedules permit, I also take them out for lunch or dinner afterward to continue the celebration. For the last three years, one of my friends has ignored my birthday completely. If it was a financial hardship I wouldn’t give it a second thought, but it’s not that for sure. I am not a materialistic person, so it’s not about a physical gift. I would be sincerely happy with a card or a phone call. I am even mad at myself for having these thoughts. This friend means the world to me; I just don’t understand why the birthday wishes don’t go both ways. I have never mentioned this to anyone. I am just wondering what this means, if anything.
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous:
If your friend books an appointment with you for her birthday facial like clockwork, she probably looks very forward to your services. I must say that I am at a loss about why she does not make it a point to remember your birthday. This is a new year, so when your friend calls to book her annual birthday facial, let her know that you’ve decided to discontinue that routine. Wish her a wonderful year and suggest getting together for a visit. I say this, because giving a facial is a lot of work, and in your case, a labor of love. If you are feeling taken for granted in any way, then this is not the appropriate gift to be giving. If your friend is showing you that she is not really into gift ‘giving,’ then she should not really be into gift ‘receiving’. Keeping it simple will help you return to enjoying your friend without this weirdness between you. If she brings it up, you can honestly say that it was obvious to you that she was uncomfortable with gift exchanges.
I wish you a Happy Birthday, in advance.
Danice Akiyoshi, ND
Danice Akiyoshi is a Naturopathic Doctor and the head of Candid Coaching Service. She has a great passion for alternative healing and has over 20 years of experience in this field. She provides a form of energy psychology called The Emotion Code, where she helps people literally get rid of their emotional baggage. She also offers personal coaching services relating to all types of issues and concerns. This is a letter she received from an anonymous reader. To send a question to Danice, email her at straighttalk@candidcoachingservices.com. You can also visit her website at http://www.candidcoachingservices.com.
